So, Martin, did you manage to overcome your fear that your child manipulates you?:) I wish that would be my major problem when I will have the kid... I really wish that I would have one right now, that would manipulate me that way all the evening long. I would not mind to be manipulated like that) even if he would be 20 already! Kidding) Anyway.. That is a really silly problem, and I see that this topic becomes forgotten here for a good reason. Guys, hold your kids on your arms as long as their weight allows you to do that) that is a great happiness, even if that is a "manipulation")
Just_R wrote: did you manage to overcome your fear that your child manipulates you?
that does sound like some new kind of a phobia)) My daughter like to be on the hands, but it is not that crucial for her, it seems to be. Actually, she cannot stand being alone on the room, that is so. But she does not demand to take her on hands, only to be near in the field of view. Though when you take her on your hands, she is ok with that as well. I do not understand, what can be so terrible, if the kid likes to be on your hands? I do that every time with pure joy - and that is the only feeling I am experience. If her diapers are not full, of course)) Just kidding)
i do not think that this is a great problem//// well, and what of it, kid is a kid and it usually wean, you know. and it is normal that they usually want us to take them on arms. and they somethimes trick us.. it is okay, you know... This period will get over ater some time.
When my sister was small, she hated to get on someone's hands. that was pretty unusual for the child at her age. I am six years older, and I was always in charge when my parents were not at home. I caressed her, changed the diapers, fed her, sang the lullabies. she loved me alot, as she does now as well. the only thing she did not like - is to sit on the hands. when you held her, she began to struggle at once, crying and screaming. Parents even consulted with the medics about that. they said that she is just being naughty and that does not represent the medical problem.
Kids are kids and you cannot know what they think especialy when these kids are still babies. Small kids need the warmth of a human body, of the person, who carries about himand who oves him and it is understandable, that when you kid sees you realy want to go to your arms. accept it. it is understandable thing to happen.
DamonLink wrote:Kids are kids and you cannot know what they think especialy when these kids are still babies
Well you are not right abut that) When the baby is small, and you are looking in its eyes - what thoughts, you think, are passing trough his mind? "I wonder if the dark matter is being transformed into the usual matter during all the lifetime of the universe, and soon the weight of the matter will reach the critical mass - and we will have the gravitational collapse of our reality". I do not think it is something like that) That is rather "Hey, my dad. It is good, I love him". Without even using the word "I". Kids do not have the self awareness - they do feel either comfort, or discomfort, in my opinion.
Just_R wrote: "I wonder if the dark matter is being transformed into the usual matter during all the lifetime of the universe, an
You've made my evening with that, thanks alot, dude)) I tend to agree with you. When the child is small - he does not even have the idea of self being... Thinking about that, if the adults would be able to get rid of it, without loosing the common sense and all the life experience - the life for us would be much more simple, in my opinion. Anyway, we cannot speak of any kind of the concious manipulation here. Love your kid, and stop thinking bulls*it about the motivation etc... when you will become old - the hugs of your kids will be the most precious ting in life!
You can't wean the child to sit in your arms when baby has essential need in this, I think any kid likes parents' attention and that's how they can communicate and connect with you without words. When somebody thinks that showing love and care will spoil the child, so they are fools! The perfect age for weaning to sit in your arms is when the child understands that he/she doesn't need parents' shelter any more. The best moments in parenthhood are when you see that your baby needs you
Andreas_Maroon wrote:Anyway, we cannot speak of any kind of the concious manipulation here.
i do not really care., if he wants to manipulate me that way - it is ok) Because I am getting as much good from that manipulation, as the kid does ) That does not mean though that this trick is going to work when he will be 18 and will ask money for the new car to get some cool chicks) such manipulations will not work with me) I never liked to manipulate people myself.. Though there are some people that really like to be manipulated themselves... Anyway, kids are just kinds - and we must not think of them badly, until they ask for it themselves)
Just_R wrote:Because I am getting as much good from that manipulation
I am agree with you) I really like to sit with the babies of my friends - and I cannot wait while I will have my own kid to be manipulated) I know by my own experience - that there are kinds, who like to be on the hands more - and those who do not like it at all. Of course - that second type is in definite minority, but there are some examples) I wonder if that means they are going to grow up being very strong and independent people. But I think their parents will not be too happy, knowing that their kid does not really like to cuddle)
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