i think that you just can not make it. as you know the child is born with the certain kind of the temperament and if he is a melancholic then he is not very confident and because of it you can not make him be confident or something like that. but still you may do something in order to help him with this problem, you always have to tell him that he can do it, he is strong and he will succeed, you have to encourage hi doing everything that may help hi to be better and your main task is to motivate you.
The best way , I think, is to teach the kid from the early years to make his own decisions. For example, you were always making him the corn flakes with milk for the breakfast. And the next time tell him to do that by himself. He will ask why should he. And you tell him that he is adult for that already. I think that building of the confidence starts from such simple things. Another thing is to teach the child to be strong mentally and physically. the best way is to take him to some kind of martial art, kick-boxing or muay thay. You should dot "overdo" your job, though, because there is a thin line between self confidence and arrogance or recklessness.
It's natural to want to prevent your child from getting hurt, feeling discouraged, or making mistakes, but when you intervene -- trying to get her invited to a birthday party she wasn't included in, or pressuring the soccer coach to give her more game time -- you're not doing her any favors. Kids need to know that it's okay to fail, and that it's normal to feel sad, anxious, or angry. When your child gets the chance to make choices from a young age, he'll gain confidence in his own good judgment. Of course, kids love to run the show, but having too much control can be overwhelming; it's best to give your child two or three options to choose from.
I read all the comments here, and I see that the only thing that is left for me is to join the opinion of the most part of people. You need to make the kid to think and to act on his own. His parents must become the last instance for him to resolve his problems. First he must try do things himself.. from going to the shop to deciding whom he wants to be when he will grow up. That is the treat of the character that must be created in the early age, and you should start from some minor things. that is for you to decide, what to start from.. A tip for free.. Wiping his butt after going to toilet?:)
I see that my point of view was already highlighted by some people here.. I am glad to see thins. that increases the chances that people who will read this will listen to the advise. You need to show the self confidence by your own example. And you need to teach the kid the responsibility, and ability to make his own decisions. Sorry, I know that I am the fifth guy, perhaps, who writes it here) but since that is truth, I think it is ok to repeat this once again) My parents simply left me alone to make my own decisions.,. that is bad of course, but that gave me the self confidence that I still have now.
If you want to see in the future the confident child, be now the confident person! For the children the greatest authority are parent. So when we thing that the monthly or one-year-old baby don't understand anything, we are wrong! They see your character and they are trying to be like you and do as you, and think as you. Confident parwnts can't grow up an unconfident child! That's impossible! I truly believe that we should be the person to whom the child wants to be like! and that's the only way. I bring up my children according to this rule, and see that they are starting to have all qualities that I have!
if you want to make your child more confident then never tell him that he is a loser and he will never get something, or he does not do right something. if he is doing something wrong then you have to show him how is right but do not shout at him. if you use some really rude methods os punishment then you will never make your child more confident. in such a way you may only spoil the situation. try to be kind and lenient and believe in your child and encourage him.
You can just to be near, i guess.. you see the thing is that confidence is a charecteristic which either is or not... And ufortunately for us, parents, we cannot do anything for our kids... We can be with them, love them and hope their health and wel-being to be strong.
Ah, you may support all his or her beginnings and ideas. you know very ofthen kids lose their confidence when parents try to stop them doing what they want, by saying - it is not what we nee, on't be silly and so on. try to take your kid as an adult and all his ideas correct.
Brendon_L wrote:you know very ofthen kids lose their confidence when parents try to stop them doing what they want,
That is much so in many cases. in the most cases, I think) But there are occasions, when all the barriers and reprimands, all the discouraging things that kid hears from the surrounding people about one of his ideas - they all only make him more eager to bring his idea to life. Remember Henrich Shliemann, for example. For those of you, who does not know, I will tell that he was the person who discovered Troya and it's civilization. All people believed that was only a myth, but he proved it was real, against all odds. That is an example how disbelief in someone's ideas only make these people to work harder. But in the case with the kids, I think it is better to show more compassion and initiative)
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest