Not so long ago, my husband began to have jealousy attacks and I cannot understand the cause. I sit at home and I’m busy with our child. We spend time together and he knows all of my friends. I understand that they say that if a person is jealous, then he loves, but I'm really starting to scare. There is no reason, but there is jealousy!
Think twice, man, perhaps the attack are not simple attacks of your husband. very often they do have a basis, and you may even not know about this.. maybe your husband has seen you with someone somewhere and thought you had been cheating him... who knows.
Maybe your husband is jealous to the baby? That does sound stupid, I am aware of that, but, nevertheless, that does happen! Of course you know better, I hope that your husband loves your kid as strong as you do. But everything may happen. On the other hand, why are you so sure that is the jealousy? there can be many reasons for a strange and irritated behaviour, and jealousy is only one of those reasons. try to think about the recent events on your family, in the life of your husband. there must be some logical reason, in my experience such things never happen simply by themselves.
Wow, I see there are really many topics about the jealousy these days here) Maybe it is something about the position of the stars in the sky?:) anyway.. Why do you think that he is jealous? Maybe he is irritated by some other thing.. Maybe he wants more of your attention, for example? In any case, you need to talk to him, and to talk to him seriously. It would be really terrible to see the relations are falling apart. And often they start to fall apart after the first symptoms - the irritation, jealousy. Speak to him, that is always the best way to get the things right.
The reasons can be quite different. Mental disorders. Fear of being alone. It can be a kind of background for sexual satisfaction. Psychological injury received in the childhood. Simple sense of ownership - "my, and all!". Low self-esteem. Fear of losing his beloved one. Maybe your husband has too much free time. Hobby (surveillance, playing "detective"). Too much imagination and a sick fantasy. You just need to talk heart to heart. Explain that his zeal could lead to the breakdown of relationships. But talk properly – remember you should talk with the beloved, but not with the man whom you "gave the best years of your life."
jelousy is not really bad. it is okay, my friend, and if you do not like it sooo much, perhaps it is time to find out what to do and how to correct the situation. or maybe you do something that is a real base to his jelousy. Perhaps you do something wrong, my friend?
I think that he just wants more of your attention! It is normal, that you are spending more time with the kid right now. How long ago did this start? Are you having a kid for a long time? how old is he? If it all started when you got the child, then I think the answer is pretty simple - he is a bit jealous to the kid... and he is trying not to show that, maybe because he is ashamed of that feeling , or because he does not understand it's source at all. Talk to him, ask him to tell you everything, and then I am sure both of you will feel much better! then you will tell us, how are you getting along)
I knew one man, a straight guy. He was tolerable to gays, actually, a good friend of mine. that is why I can telly you thins story, that I was merely involved in) He had a wife. A very early marriage, they knew each other only for five months. And in 7 months after the marriage they had a child. While she was pregnant, it was a true pleasure for me to look at this couple. "Here'", I was thinking " the way that a real family must be!". He loved her, tolerated every whim of hers with subtleness and care. All changed during the several months after the kid was born. something changed in this man, when the third person appeared in their family. He became grim, on the work and at home, he started to be jealous irritative. We all knew what was the reason.
Trust me, it is much better, when he is jealous, then when he does not care about you... but you do have a problem, and you need the advise how to solve it, this is ok, I understand) So, perhaps you need to talk with him? that is the most obvious thing, isnt it?:) By the way, ask yourself one important question, even if it is a little bit embarrassing) Do you enjoy the fact he is jealous? I know that many people do, and it is better to be honest with yourself about that) So tell me the truth, do you like that he is so nervous about your feelings towards him? I think the answer may surprise you)
Just_R wrote:Trust me, it is much better, when he is jealous, then when he does not care about you..
that is so , of course) At least that means there is a chance to make everything right - when there are feelings towards each other. If he is jealous - then he wants to be with you. that is normal. but sometimes the jealousy becomes the obsession - and the person you loved becomes a kind of maniac, who always wants to know where have you spend the time, with whom, and is he tall, and do you like him etc.. that starts top be intolerable. And then you will have the wish to leave this person yourself. I've seen that several times. And sometimes that does look scary)
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