if the love is not mutual

glenn
Posts: 47
Joined: Fri Jun 24, 2016 4:24 am

Re: if the love is not mutual

Postby glenn » Mon Jul 04, 2016 8:18 am

we often confuse the real bright feeling with a temporary passion, exaggerated wounded pride, or simple childish selfishness and desire to possess the object of their dreams right now, immediately and completely. Whatever the true reason, in any case, the best medicine and healer — time. The only thing that the time interval can range from a few weeks (yeah, there are speed of recovery) to several years (special clinical case of love fever). Scientists some titled British University, said that even the most ethereal sense is on the decline three years later.
Moppy
Posts: 952
Joined: Thu Jul 07, 2016 8:03 am

Re: if the love is not mutual

Postby Moppy » Tue Jul 12, 2016 3:07 am

Hi guys) Sometimes, people whom we love, do not reciprocate that same level of love and good will. Yet, we are still called to love people as our selves. If you have done a favor to someone, forget about it. If someone has done a favor to you, always remember it. If someone has hurt your feelings, forget it and forgive him . ;) But if you have hurt someone’s feelings, then remember it, ask for forgiveness and repent for it. As a result, you will change. The world around you will change. The people around you will change. And you will fulfill the commandment of God. You are holy love.
Paul_O
Posts: 140
Joined: Wed Jul 13, 2016 8:34 am
Location: Helsinki

Re: if the love is not mutual

Postby Paul_O » Wed Jul 13, 2016 10:04 am

glenn wrote: Scientists some titled British University, said that even the most ethereal sense is on the decline three years later.

Glenn - it is actually already a joke about those British scientists)) When you are speaking about emotions - I think not even the best scientists can refer to physiology and to give some exact numbers, as if that would be the dosage of the antidote or something) Jared, if he does not see you as a lover, then perhaps you need to ask him directly - what is the reason for that? In this case you have nothing to loose - you will remain friends in any case - and perhaps something more - if there is really a chance for that. At least you will not be torturing yourself with the uncertainty. You need to make the first move. Maybe he just afraid to make that move as well?
User avatar
Endi
Posts: 168
Joined: Tue Jul 12, 2016 7:43 am

Re: if the love is not mutual

Postby Endi » Wed Jul 13, 2016 9:14 pm

i do not even what to tell you but still i hope that i will be able to give you several pieces of advice. but i think that it would not be helpful, you have to do everything on your own and then it would be alright. i think that when you love the person you do not think that there is something bad in him. you just love him and that is it. i just hate when people try to change you and they do not like anything in you. but i know that there are different people and i can not tell about everyone.
Paul_O
Posts: 140
Joined: Wed Jul 13, 2016 8:34 am
Location: Helsinki

Re: if the love is not mutual

Postby Paul_O » Thu Jul 14, 2016 5:21 am

Endi wrote: i think that when you love the person you do not think that there is something bad in him.


Sorry Endi - I am not agree with this statement. I think that when you love a person - love as a mature man, not blindly, like we all did when we were teenagers) - we see the good sides of the person as well as the bad ones. But the point is that you do not really stop on those bad ones - and if you cannot change them - you start learning living with those "bad" things, and accept the person as it is. You do not fool yourself, making your partner look like a "perfection". Maybe I took your words wrong - sorry in that case. I am not perfect for example - and in some cases misunderstanding of that fact caused the breakups in my relations.
Just_R
Posts: 223
Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2016 8:30 am

Re: if the love is not mutual

Postby Just_R » Tue Jul 19, 2016 9:03 am

Hey Jared! If the guy treats you that way - like a friend - that means that he really see you as a friend... no disguise here. If he would simply want to get rid of you - he would act otherwise... Usually - when one sees another as a friend - there are not many chances for lover type of relations here. But if you will persist and try to move closer, it may ruin even the chance for that friendship. So you need to think if you really want to see this person in your life only as a lover. If that is so - then it is better to end your communication. Best way is to talk with him of course, to avoid misunderstanding.
Andreas_Maroon
Posts: 176
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 11:39 am

Re: if the love is not mutual

Postby Andreas_Maroon » Wed Jul 20, 2016 6:27 am

Hello guys. I wanted to say that I am not agree with the approach that some people described here. I mean that if he wants to be your friend - then let it be this way, nothing can be changed etc.. Have you ever heard about such thing as persistence? It can really do magic, with relations as well. When the person see for the long time that you really want to get closer with him, when it feels that you are the one who really needs a him - and you do not give up - that does make the impression! In a week, in a month perhaps - slowly but steady - you are winning his heart. And these relations last much longer then the usual "crush" that we have sometimes - that works in the very first meeting.
Moppy
Posts: 952
Joined: Thu Jul 07, 2016 8:03 am

Re: if the love is not mutual

Postby Moppy » Wed Jul 20, 2016 4:15 pm

You should stay close. If you belong to the category of people, which is more willing to give than to take, wait for a while, please be patient. Prove their love and devotion. Prove that you are no better. Someone I love is necessarily notice and will respond to you in return. Strive for the second half. Surprise and just love. Sometimes this is enough to change attitudes and to receive love in return. Do not focus on what you love, and you - no. It happens, as if hurt nor was it aware of it. Look at the situation from the other side. If you are pretty comfortable to be in such a relationship, then leave things as they are without trying to change anything.
Richard
Posts: 63
Joined: Mon Jul 18, 2016 5:07 pm

Re: if the love is not mutual

Postby Richard » Wed Jul 20, 2016 8:44 pm

If the love is not mutual it is really sad. We all want to have a happy love which always shown in soap operas. But reality differs greatly from what is shown there. Bu if you really love your boyfriend then you have to do something to change the situation! By the way, are you really sure that it is not mutual? You see we often imagine a lot of unreal things that's why maybe the problem exists just in your head! But if it is real try to talk to your partner. Also it'll be good to make something crazy together. You should make every day bright, because your partner can be just tired of the routine!
Paul_O
Posts: 140
Joined: Wed Jul 13, 2016 8:34 am
Location: Helsinki

Re: if the love is not mutual

Postby Paul_O » Thu Jul 21, 2016 7:07 am

Moppy wrote:wait for a while, please be patient


That is a good advice. When it is all about emotions - you always need to give the person some time - for those emotions to calm down - and for the common sense to prevail. Besides - someone wrote here about the persistence. I remember one occasion from my life. It was about the heterosexual couple. There was a guy - friend of mine - and a girl - also a friend of mine) So that guy had a big crush on the girl - but she gently rejected him all the time. And I was telling this guy - dude - she is not for you, you are way too different people. He did not listen to me - and kept pushing on. Eventually - they already married and have 2 kids now.. That makes you think about the value of my advices, I suppose)

Return to “Gay dating”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest