I want to adopt a child!

Ben_Roar
Posts: 153
Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2016 7:26 pm

Re: I want to adopt a child!

Postby Ben_Roar » Mon Sep 05, 2016 5:48 pm

V_Vegas wrote: Did your husband already left to that trip? Did not you both reconsider about looking for the adoption so far away?

We had a serious discussion on this matter this morning. We thought that it is really better for us to slow down a little bit at this moment. I did not know how to approach him with this suggestion, honestly, because he did share my excitement about this idea. I was really surprised to see that he took this suggestion really easy. It turned out to be that he was thinking the same thought himself. I think that what happened was following. The last year, and until this day - we were living the happiest time in our life - we are agree on that. But you know that it is never enough for the human nature. And we decided to make this cake even sweeter. But now we see that it is better not to tempt the fate...
Just_R
Posts: 223
Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2016 8:30 am

Re: I want to adopt a child!

Postby Just_R » Tue Sep 06, 2016 7:22 pm

Ben_Roar wrote:But you know that it is never enough for the human nature.

I know what you are speaking about, Ben. It is like with the gambler, that cannot stop playing even after he won lot of money.. And, eventually, he looses everything. Only because he tempted the fate too much. You are a wise man, if you are able to stop on at a certain point. I am joining the opinion of others - you should wait with the adoption. I do not have any doubts about the fact that you would handle two kids at once, but I think that it would not give you that joy you were expected, while you will still love both of the kids tremendously. There is still lot of time for you both to make this, dude)
Andreas_Maroon
Posts: 176
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 11:39 am

Re: I want to adopt a child!

Postby Andreas_Maroon » Wed Sep 07, 2016 6:39 pm

Just_R wrote: You are a wise man, if you are able to stop on at a certain point

Yes, Ben. I know what you are thinking about - and what irritates and infuriates you the most in this situation. You've made the mistake, when you thought you were not able to make that kind of a mistake. Ben, let's be straight about that - you were always a perfectionist) And you were good in that. But we all are people - and mistake is the most natural thing for humans. Do not be to hard on yourself.. I am sure that Mike already told you the same. You saw that this was a mistake just in time - and not many people are capable of that, especially in such a case.
Ben_Roar
Posts: 153
Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2016 7:26 pm

Re: I want to adopt a child!

Postby Ben_Roar » Thu Sep 08, 2016 8:34 pm

Andreas_Maroon wrote: Ben, let's be straight about that - you were always a perfectionist)

I never saw that as a flaw of any kind.. But now i think that sometimes I need to analyse my thoughts and actions more carefully. Anyway, the topic is closed - and that is for the good) Our Susan will get all our love care and attention during many years - and then, when she is going to grow up.. We shall see) We are going for a trip soon to some beautiful places on the south of England - and I will have some things to write inn the topic about the travelling with the kid, I think. I wonder about the author of this topic - did he make the decision about the adoption eventually?
Paul_O
Posts: 140
Joined: Wed Jul 13, 2016 8:34 am
Location: Helsinki

Re: I want to adopt a child!

Postby Paul_O » Fri Sep 09, 2016 8:33 pm

Ben_Roar wrote:I wonder about the author of this topic - did he make the decision about the adoption eventually?

I do not think so. Did you notice that there are many people here, who create the topics - and then run away somewhere from the forum?:) anyway - the topic is here - and it gave us the opportunity to discuss the things that were important for most of us. Where exactly are you going to? When I am thinking of the Great Britain and the sea - I do imagine the landscapes of Cornwall.. I've been there only once - but that place remained in my heart forever) Actually, it did remind me of my native country, Norway... the fjords and that kind of stuff) Hope to return there one day)
Andreas_Maroon
Posts: 176
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 11:39 am

Re: I want to adopt a child!

Postby Andreas_Maroon » Mon Sep 12, 2016 9:22 pm

Paul_O wrote: I do imagine the landscapes of Cornwall

they do going to Cornwall - how did you know?:) the last time I stayed there with these guys - it was on the Lands End, one of the most beautiful places in the world, as for me)) I would really like to go there again - with Ben, Mike and Susan. And the author of this post - well, I only hope that he did find some help in this answers so many people gave to him. If that was not so - well - maybe someone else did find some of them being useful! In any case - I think that if you do have some info to share on the topic - you should do that and not hesitate.
Paul_O
Posts: 140
Joined: Wed Jul 13, 2016 8:34 am
Location: Helsinki

Re: I want to adopt a child!

Postby Paul_O » Tue Sep 13, 2016 8:47 pm

By the way - I already forgot this topic was about the adoption. but I see that it does not concern none of the people who are communicating here.. So maybe this topic should be closed already? I've seen on the news recently - that the government opens the orphanage for the refugees - those ones from Africa and the Middle East. And I am not sure how to treat this news. On the one hand - that is good that these poor kids do get the help they need. On the other hand - why should that happen in Norway? Dont they have their own countries for that? I am not a racist, but I prefer Norway to stay Norway - and if some people would like to help the kids in Syria with the adoption - they can go to Sirya in order to do that..
Just_R
Posts: 223
Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2016 8:30 am

Re: I want to adopt a child!

Postby Just_R » Wed Sep 14, 2016 9:41 pm

Paul_O wrote: that the government opens the orphanage for the refugees - those ones from Africa and the Middle East.

Perhaps I am a cruel person - but I would be against this orphanage, if I would be on your place, as well .i know - it is really sad with all these refugees et cetera.. But I know what they are doing to the european countries - with your country, as well .I know that the crime level raised tremendously, since that wave of the refuges covered Europe. I really like Europe - and I do not want it to change, at least not in this way and in this direction. Your country does deserve a better fate. Will there be any kind of demonstrations about that, and about the policy towards the refugees at all?
Ben_Roar
Posts: 153
Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2016 7:26 pm

Re: I want to adopt a child!

Postby Ben_Roar » Sun Sep 18, 2016 8:05 pm

Just_R wrote:Perhaps I am a cruel person

I do not think this is about cruelty. the question is more complicated. On the one hand - we are all people, and we do have the compassion to all the living beings. Especially of our own kind. That is why we do compassion the kids from all over the world. On the other hand - we are the citizens of our countries in the same time. this is our reality, our world that we created for ourselves - we and out predecessors. And we want it to stay the way it is - not for it to be changed the way the incomers would want... So.. I confess - i did vote for Brexit - because I want to be the owner of my own country.
Just_R
Posts: 223
Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2016 8:30 am

Re: I want to adopt a child!

Postby Just_R » Mon Sep 19, 2016 9:21 pm

Ben_Roar wrote:. I confess - i did vote for Brexit - because I want to be the owner of my own country.

You are right - i think you did express my thoughts better then I was able to. You are right - it is not about the cruelty.. But since we are social beings - we do need to search the balance between the interests of separate individuals - and the society we are living in. That does lead us to the hard decisions sometimes.. Yes, I must say that some of these decisions are cruel. But we need to make them to avoid even more cruel ones in the future. This is life - and we cannot avoid doing things that our kids would condemn us for, even tohugh we are doing this for these kids.

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