you know, if you want something then you will definitely get it if you really want it very much, you just have to do anything and i am sure that you will find something really good. i think that the most important trait you shall look for in the agency is responsibility, do not look at what tey tell you, listen to people who have used and worked with it. i think that they really know better and they would never lie you. i wish you everything the best and i hope that very soon you will have the child.
Chase wrote: do not look at what they tell you, listen to people who have used and worked with it
You do have a certain point, but I would not be that suspicious to the agencies. In the end, this is their reputation and their money. If they will lie to you, work bad , then you will tell about that to all of your friends, and they will have less clients..That is pretty logical, isn't it?:) So you should listen to both clients feedbacks and the agency information. then you will get the full picture. Besides, it is good to consult in several agencies, to know what other options you have. I already called to several, and I made my own conclusions. Always better to have your own experience in such things.
Andreas_Maroon wrote: In the end, this is their reputation and their money.
Yes. But I dont think hat agency will stand for the clients interests for now.. There are not that many agencies right now, and there is a huge number of people who want to use their services. So the agencies can afford themselves such a luxury as to loose clients. that is my opinion. Besides, there is another thing. I think that it is better to have your own lawyer. Because those ones that the agency will give you, they work for the agency first of all, and they will protect the interests of the agency first of all. I sound like a paranoid, but many people said it already, that it is better safe them sorry.
Paul_O wrote:they will protect the interests of the agency first of all
Hey, do not scare people ! All is not that bad, I am sure. On the other hand, it is easy to tell that, when you have a great lawyer in your service already. I have one, for example) What he tells me in my case, is that I should think about passing trough the surrogacy program in some other country. and he is looking for the options right now. If there are any people here from LA or California basically, PM me i do have some interesting info for you. You will be sorry if you will not do that) Anyway. Paul, you are right about the lawyer basically. It is better to have a person whom you trust.
When I was small I was dreaming about having 2 kids and one of them would be adopted. That`s really a good deed to give affection, kindness and care to someone, who has been deprived of it. But now I see that there are a lot of problems and difficulties with adoption in many countries.It feels like the whole world is against you when you want to make someone happier. Tons of certificates, documents, hours of walking through the state institutions thats really annoying! However, i have done that! And be sure that the smiling happy face of MY SON now-was worth all that hell I have gone through!
Well i will tell you my story, but we did not exaqctly adopt a child... We used surrogacy program and went to Austria to realise our dream... Well, it was expencive for sure, but due to agency that helped us we realised this dream and now John and I are happy parents of a two ywar old princess named Marry)
I am not aware of all the process of caurse, but as far as I know the process is not as much different from the program for heterosexual couples. I mean the married gay couple asks help from agency, they give this help and look for a mother, who carries the baby...
David wrote:When I was small I was dreaming about having 2 kids
Wow, and how small you were when you started to dream about your own kids? 6 years maybe?:) You did have a lot of time to consider about all the details then) Anyway, I am not laughing at you, but I am happy for you. Adoption becomes easier for the gay couples these days, and I know it was not that easy say a decade ago. How old is your son, and how long did it pass since the time of his adoption? The most stories about the adoption that I've heard were unsuccessful, but I suppose that is rather my bad luck then a rule in this field. Anyway, I will consider the adoption only after the option of surrogacy.
Just_R wrote:David wrote:Anyway, I will consider the adoption only after the option of surrogacy.
The same for me, I want to have own child at first, think it will be difficult for me to become a father of adopted child at first, in future I don't exclude such option but not now.
Now we are in surrogacy program and are waiting for our first baby. It was very exciting step and when we chose the agency to start we were said that everything will be good and quickly because they try to make everything without long waiting list but finally we started our program for 1,5 month latter because there still was a waiting list and we waited for a aprox. 2 month for matching with an egg donor. These 2 months were hard for me because every day I waited that something goes wrong, I don't why, think it was feeling of fear when you decided to do something and made your first step and this waiting time seems like years. But finally everything is ok, we were matched with gay-friendly donor, pretty, young and healthy woman who donated her eggs for our child. We use my sperm, so I am biological father and I feel big responsibility for everything what is going on now
Harry_Oz wrote:Now we are in surrogacy program and are waiting for our first baby.
congratulations! I know how does it feel, and I completely understand your worries about "something goes wrong"! that is quite normal, though you cannot say it is pleasant) Anyway, you need to have trust in your agency, in the surrogate mother and God. You mentioned that you knew the egg donor. Do you know the surrogate mother as well? Or maybe your agency has the same policy as the Biodads, I mean that they do not allow you to communicate with the surrogate mother? When will the baby be delivered? Anyway, remember this time - when all will happen, you will recall these days with nostalgia)
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